So, I've been getting messages and emails from you asking where the heck I have been. I haven't posted on my blog in several months, and I haven't really posted any videos since I came back from my business convention. Well, life got really, well, chaotic in a lot of ways. I thought I wouldn't be as busy as I normally am this summer, but actually, I was the busiest I have ever been.
Building something from the ground up takes a lot of time, effort, focus, and energy. That's where I've been.
I actually can't really believe that this is finally live. Like, this is real! The vision has come to life, everything I've been working on for the past several months (not to mention the research over the past three years) is finally up and running! Well, this is a surreal moment that I'm just going to enjoy for a few minutes.
I feel a little all over the place right now. There is so much I want to update you on, but I'll probably bore you to sleep if I share with you all the details of my crazy. A video will be posted shortly with all you need to know. For now, these are the things that kept me busy this summer:
1. Preparing To Move. Sorta.
Yes, I said move. I also said sorta, because it's complicated. My ballet career has evolved, and I have a big goal in mind for this year: to land a spot in the English National Ballet School in 2019 located in London, England. I've been working hard, but getting into such a prestigious school requires a lot more than just hard work. It requires 100% effort and the best possible training. Thanks to the generosity and kindness of my parents, this has been made possible. And thanks to the generosity of my grandparents, I have a place to stay during the week as I train at Los Angeles Ballet Academy in their pre-professional program as well as continuing my coaching with Philip Pegler, my favorite ballet master in Santa Clarita. So in a way, I am moving to LA, but just for the week. On the weekends, I'll be home with my family & visiting friends back home in Bakersfield.
2. I Launched My Business With Market America
I'm not up front about this much because of the fact it's a totally separate category in my life. I've done a couple of video talking about launching my business, but not many people really know what it is or much about it. All you need to know is that I am now apart of something that has changed people's lives, and I'm so lucky to have a team that is just as goal oriented to thrive in the world we now live in. And I am so very blessed to have found something that will bring in the finances I need to live my dreams and one day provide for my family.
3. I Also Started A Third Business
By this point, I think a lot of people either think I'm nuts or a total overachiever for starting a third business. What? Who can blame me? I nearly had a breakdown thinking about getting a traditional job, balancing my ballet schedule (which, by the way, is 14 hours a week), juggling my business, and keeping in the game with my new brand. It's a lot, especially for an 18 year old. My mom and I were processing one day and she came up with the idea behind my business, and Ellie Rose Services was born. I'm thankful to my Mom for saving me, but I'm also really proud of myself for following through and getting the job done. Hard work does pay off.
4. Building A New Brand
I have been very privileged to learn about blogging, website development, content creation, trends, business behind branding, and more from experienced people. My goal for LIFE ON POINTE a few months ago was unclear. I forced myself to sit down and really think about what I wanted. Ideas began to flow, and after calls with mentors, businessmen, marketing designers and professionals, I had a whole 180 page strategy. I was pretty amazed with what I came up with. After this was drafted, I got my team together and talked with them individually, began speaking with people I wanted to collaborate with, and even had the pleasure of bringing on two interns. Who knew this was going to all be born in a four month period?! Certainly not me.
It takes so much time, effort, money, energy, commitment, passion, and focus to actually build a brand. There's paperwork involved, a lot of research (especially when you don't have any money to pay someone to help you), and a lot of trial and error. But even through all the overwhelming flood of crazy that happens, you learn a lot. I learned a lot. I even found my voice. I found out who I was as someone who started a brand and I figured out what I wanted to say. I know what I want now, and seeing this finally come to life after three years of research and four months of ground-breaking work is really special.
5. I Spent 2-Weeks In Paradise (Hawaii)
I went to Hawaii for two weeks, which was much needed. I was so exhausted from my schedule, the traveling I've been doing for business, and was in desperate need of a mental break. I knew I needed a break because I was getting little sleep, I was feeling sick all the time, my mental state was not really in the best place, and my eyes literally hurt so much from reading, writing, researching, etc. I was running my life at 180 miles an hour and I was really, really burnt out.
Spending time in a place that is so breathtakingly beautiful with family away from work and needing to be on demand what felt like 24/7 was much needed. It was great to leave my emails to an intern. It was great not having to worry that my clients needs weren't being met or that the launch of my brand wasn't going to be on schedule. I shut off my emails. I shut off most of social media. I posted on Instagram just for the memory sake. I had my phone on DO NOT DISTURB the entire trip, and you know, yeah. I did have a ton of texts, but I didn't feel obligated to answer them.
But in a time where you're doing nothing, you automatically begin to self-reflect. I did a lot of self-reflecting this trip and I learned a lot about myself. I figured out what I was struggling with back home. I figured out why I felt the need to always be working or doing something. I figured out a lot about my emotions, and how much pent-up energy or how many issues I didn't realize existed were left untouched. It gave me a lot of time to "clean up" my mental state a bit.
6. I'm Stuck In A Mourning Phase
I'm assuming a lot of you aren't going to understand what this means. In the month of August, I lost two people who I loved very, very much.
I have to take deep breaths as I write this because it's still really fresh and still really hurts. In April of this year, I took a mental health break and went on a trip to Redding to visit the Transformation Center. I saw a therapist and we worked through some issues that I was dealing with. Long story short, on that trip I let go of all my coping mechanisms, and I'm not talking about escaping into books or movies or food, I'm talking about what I used to do to cope with my pain in a mental sense. So imagine relearning what it's like to mourn and go through grief. Imagine what it's like to want so desperately to manage your emotions in a healthy way. That's what I've been going through recently.
Shawna was a member of our church, and she lost her fight to cancer. She was the most incredibly kind, genuine, loving woman you could ever meet. She was the person who when she saw something that reminded her of a person, she would buy it and give it to them as a gift. She was the type of person who when you hugged her, you felt how much she loved and cared about you even if she didn't know you well. She was the type of person who saw only the best in people. Out of everyone I know, she is definitely one of the strongest people I have ever met. She fought cancer almost all of her life, but the thing I loved most about her is that she was always hopeful. She always hoped, because her faith was strong, and her steadfast trust in God led her home to be in His arms. Rest well.
And Bryson, well, I've known him for many years. I always had this soft spot for him in my heart. He was such a good man. He was so kind, passionate, loving, fierce, and bold. He loved Jesus with all of his heart and pursed Him with such an inspiring steadfastness. I didn't know him well, but we did talk every so often and when we did, it would be for a long period of time. He would share with me his revelations in reading the bible and pray with me and for me. If I was having a rough time, he'd ask me to share about it and remind me that I am not my circumstance. He really meant a lot to me. He was only a 23 year old young man who passed away from a horrible accident. I really loved him, and when you were around him you could feel his love for people and for Christ just radiating off of him. Rest well, Lion.
So, yeah. There's been a lot, and some of it has been really tough. But you know, I'm really excited for this next season. Or, I guess the season that began today. I'm excited to go back to work, to go back to dance, to hit the ground running again with refreshment and rejuvenation. I'm going to do my best to kick-butt this year. I know I will because I know I can.
If you read this whole thing, wow. Thank you for taking the precious time out of your day to read what I have to say. That really means a lot to me. Be sure to like this post and leave a comment! I love chatting with you guys.